The internship is over (Hurrah!)! For anyone who is interested, here is the journal I had to write for my class. Some of the dates do not correspond to my previous blog entries (blogtries, entrogs) because I couldn't remember when I did what and I didn't write this as I went along like I was supposed to have done. But this is all true stuff; it just may not have happened on the particular dates or in the order I said they did. Also, I talk alot about a book in this journal. That is because it was required that we link our experience to what we read in that stupid, useless, self-helpish book. So, enjoy.
October 8, 2007
2pm – 4pm
Today was my orientation at Hospice. I had to fill out a lot of paperwork and sign a paper about HIPPA. I never even thought about having to sign something like that, although it does make sense since I’ll have access to information about the patients and their families. HIPPA says that I cannot divulge any information about people receiving services at Hospice to anyone else.
After filling out all the paperwork I got a tour of the place. The building is only the office for Hospice. The inpatient facility is elsewhere. Upstairs is where the home health aids, doctors, and nurses, as well as others, have their offices. I will be working mostly downstairs in the bereavement department.
I’m still not entirely sure what it is that I’ll be doing here. I know that I will be working in bereavement and, after discussing my goals with my supervisor here, we’ve decided that I’ll be going on some ride-alongs as well. I hope this internship turns out the way I want and I actually learn something from it.
My orientation made me think about what I read in our book this week about why I want a human service career. I didn’t always want a human service career. I’ve wanted to do so many things, probably because I didn’t really know what I wanted to do. It was until the beginning of my third year in college that I decided to be a sociology major. Then it was another semester before I decided I wanted to be a social worker. I’ve known for a long time that I didn’t ever want to do something meaningless for my career. I’ve had some terrible jobs and I want to feel like the career I choose is really helping people. In this internship, I’m hoping to gain some skills that will help me to help others.
October 19, 2007
9am – 2:30pm
I’ve started to learn a little about what is expected of me. I was taught how to make bereavement calls today. I was absolutely terrified when I was told that I would be calling the family members of people who had died to see how they are doing. Once I started doing it, it wasn’t so bad. I just look in their file, call the number, ask them “how are you?,” and tell them that we have individual and group support services available.
I made about twenty calls today and had to do charting for each call I made, writing down who I called, why I called, and any observations I had. Most of them didn’t take too long, except for the woman who kept talking to me for nearly an hour. These calls were 1-month calls (calls made 1 month after the death of a loved one). Sherry, the woman I’ve been working with, told me that these are usually the most time-consuming calls to make. The other calls that hospice makes are after 6 months and after 1 year, at which time the people are discharged and services discontinued.
The chapter of the book we read this week talked about the difference between a volunteer and an intern, which I thought was the most pertinent information for me. In the bereavement department there are no interns besides me and I’m not sure there ever has been. There are a lot of volunteers though, and I am classified as a volunteer since I am unpaid. I don’t do quite the same things as the other volunteers, however. The other volunteers will stuff envelopes and help decorate for special events. They do all the things that take little thought or effort while I do all the harder things like making calls. This is because I’m trying to learn and they just want to help out.
I do get a little annoyed sometimes, though. Since I’m a volunteer but I’m an intern most people working at hospice don’t know what I do there exactly. I’ve had to explain about being an intern and what I do as an intern so many times already and people still don’t really understand. I’ve heard people tell others what I’m doing and they seem to always get it completely wrong. I guess it’s okay as long as they don’t expect me to do anything I didn’t agree to.
October 26, 2007
9am – 3:30pm
I was busy making 6-month phone calls today. They are a whole easier than the 1-month calls I had been making last week. I’m getting slightly more comfortable making the calls as well. I keep forgetting I’m supposed to do certain things, though. Or else I’m supposed to do things and I don’t know that I’m supposed to because I was never told. Usually I only need to be told something once and I remember but I have forgotten a couple things. There’s so much I have to do to make these calls. Mostly I just mess up the charting if I do make a mistake. I forgot to initial the front paper in a couple charts. Everything I do has to be signed off on, though, so the mistake was caught right away. It wasn’t anything major.
The only other thing I did besides make phone calls was doing filing. It isn’t so bad. It’s certainly boring but I’ll probably have to do it anywhere I go. I have to pull files, put them back, sometimes I have to search all over for them when someone has put them in the wrong spot. That’s kind of annoying. I thought people knew the alphabet. I guess not.
I have not had any trouble with clients not accepting me like it talks about in the book. If anything I have the opposite problem. I feel like when I make my calls that they think I’m some kind of counselor or that I’m qualified to help them and give them advice. I want to tell them, “I don’t know anything! I’m just an intern. I wasn’t trained for this!” Instead, I just listen to what they have to say without interrupting and if I deem it is appropriate I give the person a phone number they can call to receive bereavement support. It’s all I know how to do. It makes me feel a little lost at times, though.
October 29, 2007
9am – 4pm
I did more filing and making phone calls today. I made more of the bereavement calls. I also had to call people about their addresses. Hospice sends out different mailings and some of them were returned to us because the address was not correct. So, I had to call them and check to see what their correct address is. I wasn’t able to contact most of the people, but I did correct a few addresses. I don’t know how they got so messed up in the first place. Some of them even had the city wrong, which can cause problems since we discontinue phone calls after a month if they do not live within a certain area.
The bereavement calls did not quite go as smooth as usual. I called one woman and told her that I was from Hospice. Before I could say anything else she asked me why hospice was calling her since her aunt was dead. Se sounded pretty angry. I told her that we were going to be sending her some information about support services in her area. Once again she didn’t listen to what I had to say, cut me off before I was finished speaking. She asked me why she needed services if her aunt is dead and who I was. I repeated who I was and that I worked in the bereavement department. I tried to tell her again about the purpose of my call but she interrupted me yet again to yell at me and tell me how unhappy she is with hospice. She told me she wanted nothing to be sent to her and hung up on me. I was so shocked by that. I haven’t had anyone that I’ve called treat me that way. I didn’t take it too hard, though because she did just lose somebody and that’s got to be hard. I told Sherry, the bereavement specialist, about the woman and she said she would call her to see what was wrong.
I feel like I have pretty good relationships with all of my coworkers. Of course, I don’t really have many coworkers. I haven’t had any of the problems that the book talks about. I work mostly with Sherry. When I’m at hospice we share an office. She’s very nice and I feel like I can talk to her, which is good. The other people that I’ve met are also nice. I don’t really see them, though. The only people I get a chance to talk to are Sherry, Sue – my supervisor, and Jessica – the new person in charge of volunteer work. I like Jessica a lot. She’s closer to my age than the other people who work in the office. She was a sociology major too and I feel like we get along pretty well even if we don’t get a chance to talk much. I have not encountered any problems with my coworkers thus far. Hopefully it stays that way.
November 6, 2007
6pm – 8pm
Tonight was hospice’s annual Coping With the Holidays event. It is a program to help people get through this difficult time of year after they have experienced a loss. We had a couple speakers talk about their experiences and how they manage to cope, live music, a candle lighting ceremony, and refreshments. It was a really good program.
I greeted people at the door when they arrived. I gave them programs and directed them into the conference room. People were able to bring pictures of loved ones to put on the table up front for everyone to see, so I told them where to put them also. I didn’t really do much else, but I’m glad I got to go to this.
This week’s reading talked about how everyone works together. I think I’ve gotten a better picture of that lately than when I first arrived. I’ve been able to see what many different people do at hospice and will be observing others in the weeks to come. In the bereavement department, we all deal with people after a death has occurred. We are there to give support and help people get through their first year apart from their loved one.
The little that I know of the hierarchy within this department is as follows: The main person in charge is Sue, then Sherry. Under Sherry are the people in the cubicles in the main office. (Some of this is just guess work from watching them interact with one another. I assume Sherry has more authority since I’ve seen her tell them to do things.) We also have the person in charge of volunteers, Jessica. I’m not sure exactly how Jessica fits into the hierarchy. She coordinates the volunteer work, so her job doesn’t really fall under the same category as Sherry’s but I have seen Sherry ask her to do things. I think that might be more because Jessica is still learning about her new job than the fact that she actual has to report to Sherry, though. Then, under Jessica are, of course, the volunteers. I am sort of a volunteer, and I do have to report to her to give her my time sheet, but she doesn’t tell me to do anything. If Sue has not scheduled any kind of ride-along for me I work in Sherry’s office and she tells me what to do.
November 16, 2007
9am – 4pm
I made more phone calls and sent out mailings for the Christmas event that hospice is having. The calls were 12-month calls. These calls are much easier to make and usually take less time, especially since I’ve gotten used to doing the charting and remember what I’m supposed to say to everyone. I think I made about 30 – 40 calls today. It’s getting to be kind of boring. Sending out the mailings was very tedious work, but it was nice to not have to talk to anyone for a little while. I don’t mind making phone calls as much as I once did but I still get tired of it at times.
The chapter we read this week was all about getting to know the community that your site is in. I don’t know that I really understand the community any better than I did before. I’ve met many people, none of them alike. Hospice is in Modesto, which I still know little about. Not everyone I work with is from Modesto, though. Also, the patients at Hospice come from all over the county. I think there are even some in San Joaquin County, which I don’t really understand since there’s Hospice there as well. The only community I can think of categorizing them into is the Central Valley. It’s very hard to generalize. Many, perhaps most, of the patients on hospice are very poor and live out near rural areas. But some are very well off too, although they are in the minority. Other than that I don’t know too much about this specific community and I don’t really see how it would help me anyway.
November 21, 2007
9:30am – 4pm
Today I put together files for the children’s support group. A group is going to be meeting so I made files and put each child’s registration papers and signed forms into them. It was pretty easy and didn’t take too long. Once again, I made phone calls. These were more 1-month calls, my least favorite. At least no one yelled at me this time. I talked to one woman for a very long time. I thought I would never be able to get off the phone. She had just lost her husband a few weeks ago and they had been married for 76 years. I thought that was incredible. I’ve never met anyone who’d been married for so long. It’s no wonder she was having such a difficult time after losing someone who had been with her for nearly all of her life.
Well, I haven’t had any problems yet. This book keeps talking about the bad things that can happen and all the difficulties that people face but I don’t relate to that at all. Everything is going well for me. I have thought about my suitability for a career working with people, though. My career goal is to be a social worker and I’m having doubts now. Just making these phone calls every week seems to take everything out of me. I don’t know if I want this kind of career anymore or, rather, if I’d really be good at it. What I’m doing now isn’t what I’d be doing in a real job so I’m not sure. I keep thinking, “What if I try to pursue this and I fail? What will I do then?” I think I’m just getting nervous. I can do this internship just fine but I worry about the future when I’m out of school and I’m expected to know how to do things.
November 26, 2007
9:30am – 2pm
Today was a little more interesting. I went on another ride-along. This was one was with one of the social workers, Kristi. She took me out to one house that she had to visit. This was her first visit to the residence. The patient had Alzheimer’s. She was very nice and so were her daughter and son-in-law. The woman was very confused at times and didn’t answer many of the questions she was asked appropriately. When Kristi asked how many children she had, she started talking about her siblings. She did that kind of thing pretty often. Also, her daughter said that she sometimes sees a little girl who isn’t there sitting in one of the chairs. Kristi said it wasn’t uncommon. She talked to them about what they might need, got to know a little about them, and gave them a number to call in case they needed anything before she came back.
This visit actually made me feel much better about wanting to be a social worker. I think I could do this and really like it. Maybe not at hospice, but I think I could be a social worker. I’d rather work in a different area, though. I’m not sure what area yet. I guess I’ll have time to decide that.
This chapter was about confrontation and problem resolution. I did not find this applicable to me whatsoever. I have had no confrontations or reasons for confrontations and I definitely don’t have problems that need to be resolved. I get along really well with everyone and I usually work alone anyway. When I do need something from a coworker or have to work with them, we get along fine. I have no problem with my supervisor either. I only ever see her in passing so it isn’t an issue.
December 3, 2007
9am – 4pm
I had a ride-along with a home health aide, Janet, today. We drove all over the place going to different patients’ houses. It was interesting to see what other people do who work for hospice. She had to give a couple people baths. When the person can’t get out of bed, they have to be given a bed bath. This is done by removing their clothing and using a wet washcloth to clean them off. This takes more time than it sounds although Janet can do it pretty quickly. That was most of what she did. She just gave them baths since that is what they needed today and brushed hair, and got them dressed.
I couldn’t believe how awful the patients looked. I’ve never seen people who look so deteriorated. One woman had so many sores that were bandaged up. She was really bony too. She is the skinniest person I have ever seen in my entire life. I’m not exaggerating either. She looked like those pictures I always see of people starving to death or of anorexics when they are close to death. She was all bones and flaps of skin. It was horrible. It made me hurt to look at her. At least they all weren’t like that.
This week’s chapter talked about being competent and fulfilled at work. I feel like I am much more competent now. Instead of having everything explained to me I can do many tasks assigned to me without needing any help. I even find the phone calls somewhat fulfilling at times, especially when I get to help someone with something. Even if all I do is give them a phone number to call, it feels like I’m finally helping somebody. The other day I helped a woman who wanted to donate some furniture and she was so grateful. It’s such a huge change from the last job I worked at. I was so unappreciated and it made me so unhappy working at such a useless, thankless job. I need to feel like I’m doing something important and I do feel that sometimes here at hospice. These people need someone to talk to, to help them and I can do something about that.
December 7, 2007
9am – 4pm
I chose to write about today because I went on another ride-along and that is much more interesting than talking about filing and phone calls. I went to the Hospice House in Hughson. I met the dietician, Katie, there. We went around to the patients and she assessed them. There are sixteen beds there and she is the only dietician. She also goes out to patients who live elsewhere too. So, she usually sees each patient about once a month unless they have a special need and have to be seen more frequently.
Katie went around and asked the patients if they could chew and swallow. She asked if the food they were receiving was okay, if they were eating it, if they wanted something else. Today’s patients were fairly simple. Usually she has to do evaluations on how well they can swallow or change their diet. One thing they do if it’s hard to swallow is add a thickener to the patient’s liquids. This helps them to swallow easier.
The book talks about professional, legal, and ethical issues. I have not encountered any issues relating to this, though I see how it would be possible to do so. Working in a medical-type setting or counseling setting, I have to be careful about what I can say about my work when I’m not there. I have not heard of anyone I work with doing anything questionable and I certainly don’t give out client or patient names or identifying information. So, I don’t have any problem with these issues at all.
December 11, 2007
9am – 2pm
Today wasn’t as exciting as my last entry. I did the most boring work ever. I had to go through every file in the bereavement department and count the files that came from different places. So I went through each month and counted the files with white labels, then the files with yellow labels, then how many of the yellow and white files had a green mark on them. It took me several hours to do this. It had to be done because hospice is doing some kind of thing with all the stats and needed it all done by tomorrow.
That wasn’t the only thing I did. I also took files of recently deceased patients’ family members and got them ready for entry in to the database for the bereavement department. I had to pull out copies of one paper and put in the original after stamping it and pulling off the yellow duplicate to be sent to the office upstairs. It was more boring work but not so bad as the counting of the hundreds of files.
My internship is now finished. Finally. It was good experience but it was very time and energy consuming. I’m glad I did this. I learned a lot about how hospice works and what they do before and after a person dies. I never all the things they do. I’ve also learned a little about myself as well. I learned that I really do want to help people and that I can help people. I also learned that I don’t want to do that at hospice. Not that I hated it. I didn’t dislike it, but it isn’t what I want to do specifically. I’m much more comfortable talking to people on the phone now too! I guess all I needed to do was make a few hundred calls to get used to it. All in all, this was a good thing for me to do.
